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Pun Title Challenge Fic: Cream Puffed Up

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18 September 2005 | 10:10
posted by: carodee in the_safehouse

Title: Cream Puffed Up
Author: Caro Dee
Format: Ficlet
Hatstand Archive, Circuit Archive, Pros-Lib: yes
Slash/Gen: Slash
Summary: Time changes us all. Older lads and domestic fluff.
Disclaimer: I do not own Bodie and Doyle and make no profit from this.
Notes: This was written for the Pun Title challenge at the_safehouse. queenbamfie was kind enough to beta.


Bodie shut his eyes against the horrible vision confronting him, but when he opened them again, nothing had changed. That was still a bowl of oatmeal and -- Bodie grimaced -- half a grapefruit set out in front of him where he was used to more substantial fare.

"Here, what's this?" he demanded of Ray, who was just seating himself across the table and facing his own disgusting breakfast. Bodie noted resentfully that Ray's oatmeal was swimming in full fat milk and a generous helping of sugar, while he was stuck with skim and a sprinkling of sweetener.

"Doctor's orders," Ray said firmly. "Best way to lower your cholesterol is to lose some weight."

Bodie frowned and sucked in his gut. It made less of a difference than he would have liked. He eyed Ray sullenly. Gray hair suited him and he was still as slender as the day they were partnered together. Just wasn't right. "How come you're still so skinny?"

"Genetics." The old bastard didn't even have the decency to look ashamed at the injustice. "My da was the same way. All the Doyle men have fast metabolisms."

Bloody unfair to be born into the wrong family. Then again, he could still draw the ladies. If he put in the effort. Well, the more mature ones at any rate. It had been a while since a younger bird had given him the eye back.

"Ray, you don't think I'm fat, do you?"

At the plaintive tone, Ray looked up from his oatmeal, examining Bodie with wary concern before breaking into a cheerful leer. "Looks good on you, it does. Nice and cushy when I'm rolling around on top of you."

Not nearly reassuring enough to suit Bodie. "You do think I'm fat," he pouted. "Used to be you raved about my looks, my charm, my manly physique. What a handsome fella I was. You couldn't get enough of me. Guess you've gone off me, then?"

Ray set his spoon down. "You forgot 'engagingly modest'," he pointed out.

"One of my better qualities," Bodie agreed.

Ray sighed ostentatiously, then stood up, leaned over the table and slid one warm hand round the back of Bodie's neck. Glaring down at him, Ray said, "You, mate, have got absolutely nothing to be modest about." Then he pulled Bodie forward into a hard kiss.

Oh, much better. Bodie smugly accepted the kiss as his due and decided he just might concede on the oatmeal. Only to please Ray, of course. The grapefruit, now, that was getting chucked in the bin as soon as Ray's back was turned.

Ray broke off the kiss and smiled, his expression affectionate yet cynical. "Now eat your grapefruit before I shove it down your gob."

Damn.

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Comments {25}

Nikki

(no subject)

from: nakeisha
date: 18 September 2005 14:16 (UTC)
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:-) Very nice. An easy to see scene.

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 15:33 (UTC)
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Thank you. :-) Even as old men with health problems, Ray and Bodie would still tease each other.

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the_cornettist

(no subject)

from: the_cornettist
date: 18 September 2005 14:57 (UTC)
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Very good - I really enjoyed reading this. Loved Ray apparently reading Bodie's mind at the end...

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 15:31 (UTC)
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Whoops! *g* I'm glad you said that since I didn't mean to give Ray psychic powers. I've edited to make it clear that Bodie dislikes grapefruit. Ray just knows his Bodie very well indeed.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

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the_cornettist

(no subject)

from: the_cornettist
date: 18 September 2005 15:44 (UTC)
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Sorry, didn't mean for you to change it - I just assumed that Ray knew him so well, he knew his tastes and what he would be thinking.

But it was brill, please keep it up! A great Sunday afternoon read :)

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 16:01 (UTC)
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No, no, you had a point. When I beta, one of my most frequent comments is that the writer hasn't sufficiently set up for a realization and the character appears psychic. So I was primed to react to your comment. *g*

It is rather leisurely Sunday-ish, isn't it? Not a speck of angst anywhere. Thank you for the compliment. :-)

PS. Best personalized icon I've ever seen! I'm mesmerized.

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the_cornettist

(no subject)

from: the_cornettist
date: 18 September 2005 20:23 (UTC)
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PS. Best personalized icon I've ever seen! I'm mesmerized.
Yes, isn't it? probodie made it for me as penance for some of her sins...

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probodie

(no subject)

from: probodie
date: 18 September 2005 16:29 (UTC)
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That was excellent - I can just visualise Bodie's disgust hehehe

(oh and I made S_C_Enigma's icon - glad you like it!!)

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 16:33 (UTC)
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Thank you! *g*

(oh and I made S_C_Enigma's icon - glad you like it!!)

Oooo! *switches fangirly focus over to you* Excellent icon!

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the_cornettist

(no subject)

from: the_cornettist
date: 18 September 2005 20:24 (UTC)
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(oh and I made S_C_Enigma's icon - glad you like it!!)
All right, keep yer wig on - I've given credit!

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londonronnie

(no subject)

from: londonronnie
date: 18 September 2005 17:04 (UTC)
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Loved this.

I'm developing more and more of a penchant for the older lads and this fitted the bill perfectly.

Thank you!

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 17:27 (UTC)
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I just want you to know that, as I was reading your comment, I gave myself a vicious, rabid plotbunny. Title: Don't Worry, We're Old Pros At This! a la Miss Marple or Mrs. Pollifax. *headdesk* Nooooo! *whimper*

After all, no matter how much old age mellows the lads, it's not like they won't ever NOT be dangerous fellows.

*cough* Yes, the older lads are nice. Speaking as an older lass myself. *g*

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londonronnie

(no subject)

from: londonronnie
date: 18 September 2005 17:42 (UTC)
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Speaking as an older lass myself. *g*

Join the club, baby. Join the club...

;-)

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Gilda Elise

(no subject)

from: gilda_elise
date: 18 September 2005 17:18 (UTC)
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Oh, this is cute! And I can just see this scene being played out in their later years (of course, Ray's metabolism will be different from MS's. ;-))

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 18 September 2005 17:30 (UTC)
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Thank you! I don't know about MS, but Ray's certainly an excitable fellow and that kind of nervous tension suggests a skinny, cranky old man. <-- meant lovingly. *g*

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Mab of the Antipodes

(no subject)

from: mab_browne
date: 18 September 2005 20:02 (UTC)
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Mr Shaw looks - um - reassuringly sturdy these days. I think he looks not bad for a mature, mature chap *g*

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shayheyred

(no subject)

from: shayheyred
date: 19 September 2005 02:56 (UTC)
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Yeah, as my friend said, passing the tv as I was watching "Judge John Deed," -- I'd do him.

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shayheyred

(no subject)

from: shayheyred
date: 19 September 2005 02:52 (UTC)
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Oh, sigh, domestic bliss. Love it!

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 19 September 2005 12:05 (UTC)
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It is fun, isn't it? *g* Over in The Sentinel, Jim and Blair are so married and domestic bliss is very popular. Bodie and Doyle, OTOH, have the warrior lovers vibe and so you don't get nearly as much domesticity. This was a fun way to sneak it in.

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Titta

(no subject)

from: tittakv
date: 19 September 2005 19:39 (UTC)
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Nicely domesticated, warm and fun. I'm with Bodie on the grapefruit eating!

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 19 September 2005 21:29 (UTC)
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Thank you. And your icon is so appropriate too. *g*

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Justacat

(no subject)

from: justacat
date: 20 September 2005 22:08 (UTC)
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I love this! You got Bodie's voice just right - the smugness overlying the hint of insecurity - and captured the sweetness/snarkiness of their relationship so well, even in this very short piece. The lads domesticated is not always my favorite thing, but there are times I like it, and this was one of them....

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 21 September 2005 16:28 (UTC)
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Thank you! *g* I'm so pleased you enjoyed it. One of the things that makes B/D dialog so fun to write is exactly that affectionate snarkiness, so I'm delighted I caught it.

Domestic!RayandBodie does sort of boggle the mind, doesn't it? They're so busy single-handedly saving Britain, who would have time to vacuum? Um, hoover? Which is why I aged them until it felt more likely.

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Thoraa

(no subject)

from: thoraarwin
date: 22 September 2005 20:41 (UTC)
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The dialogue is spot-on! I can just see them like this... Bodie's a darling. *chuckle*

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Caro Dee

(no subject)

from: carodee
date: 23 September 2005 12:19 (UTC)
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You are a woman of taste and discernment. ;-) Bodie is absolutely a darling.

Thank you, I'm glad you liked the dialog.

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